I was planning to write about this topic a long time ago. Not only because it’s one of the things I experienced myself but more so as it has come up in my work with researchers very often. The feeling of not being adequate, not doing enough and other people finding out that you are a fraud and actually should not be doing this project, this PhD or teaching because you simply don’t have the right skills and there are too many other people being far better and more confident than you… or so the story goes.
Elaine Bailey, a great business and life coach, sees this syndrome as a ‘story that you are telling yourself’. There is often something that triggers it which can be linked to fear which then further leads to you giving your power away. In the end, as she says, you sabotage your own process. What matters most here is to recognise that what you are telling yourself is only a story – it’s not the truth! It’s a pattern that has been created and turned into a habit.
The key questions she invites you to ask here are: What is triggering you to feel like an impostor? When does it show up? This creates more self-awareness and you can recognise better what situations bring it up. One of the ways to deal with it is also to be kinder and more compassionate to yourself.
‘Trigger is only a trigger if it hooks you up with a story’, Elaine continues.
If you manage to recognise it, you get a chance not to be taken blindly on a journey you don’t want to be on. You have a choice – a choice to choose your own story.
If feeling like an impostor has been part of your professional or research life for a long time it probably became a habit. However, as every habit it can be changed – if you decide to do so.
Choose your own story – while being kind to yourself – and you will get to reframe the situation. This reframing opens different options and alternatives (I wrote more about reframing in this blog). It also takes you away from feeling like a victim to being a creator. Remember, it is you who creates your own life.
What story do you want to tell yourself?